The very first thing that needs to be said is that all families are absolutely individual, and, accordingly, the situations in which addiction is involved are completely different for everyone. The article below is intended to help and push people close to drug addicts or alcoholics to change.
Where should I start?
First of all, it is necessary to stop communicating with the addicted person by means of attacks and scandals. All kinds of insults and belittling of his personality will only lead to aggravation of the problem. Therefore, it is necessary to seriously change your attitude to interaction with the patient. Of course, the best option is to seek advice from a practicing psychotherapist at a drug treatment center, for whom drug addiction treatment is the main type of activity.
It is this kind of specialist who is able to identify unconstructive behavior patterns that provoke quarrels in the family and further abuse of the patient. At the same time, many people close to drug addicts or alcoholics are very upset when they realize that there is no single correct method and that a miracle will not happen in the next few days, and that long-term joint work plays a big role.
Recommendations for relatives and friends of the addict:
- Do everything to get rid of the feeling of guilt for your child’s mistakes.
- If your son (daughter) is old enough not to obey your demands, then you should let him (her) be responsible for his (her) own actions. You will not be able to put your head on his (her) shoulders in any way. Even if you find out what your mistake was in raising him (her), you will still not change anything! It is better to direct your efforts and energy to finding information that will help you understand what is happening to your child and your family.
- It is important to be extremely honest with the addict.
- If the patient is not confident in your truthfulness, he will not be able to trust you and fulfill your conditions.
- Don’t try to hide from your close circle that a family member suffers from addiction.
- This is important for two reasons: firstly, he will not have the opportunity to use the ignorance of his surroundings to beg for money to buy the potion, and secondly, such an act will show him that he really does have problems.
- The parents of your son’s (daughter’s) friends should be aware of the current situation.
- The high prevalence of drug addiction is directly related to total silence, which means there is a chance that he will pass on this disease.
- Ask yourself: If my child knows that in case of trouble with the law, debts, etc., his parents will stand up for him, is he motivated to change something in his life?
- Keep confrontations with the drug addict to a minimum.
- This does not mean that you should pretend that everything is fine. Your attitude to vices should be stated directly and without equivocation, as well as complete disapproval of drug use. Under no circumstances should you use money as a motivating tool.
- Do not trust an addict (especially a drug addict) with valuables, documents and money.
- If your child’s partner is a drug addict, then you should make an effort to break up. In this case, two situations are relevant: first, your loved one does not take drugs, but this is only for a while, since in 80% of cases such people get used to them; second, if both take drugs, then it will never end as long as they are together. In the history of drug addiction, there are no successful cases of curing drug-addicted couples. If we imagine that they decided to undergo drug addiction treatment together, then their communication will constantly provoke them to return to use, since they remember well how it was before and what pleasure they had together. If they break up, then at least one of them will have a chance to survive.
Remember: there are no hopeless situations, there is only weak will and insufficient desire.